All You Need Is Love......And Racial Identity

Still thinking about and praying for Virginia mom today, as well as her three children including the one yet to be born. There are so many things to process through this, er, process....Today I am thinking a lot about how it will be, and if we will do a good job, parenting an African American child. I have read many different opinions on this. Some are for transracial adoption. Some are vehemently against. One AA social worker basically said that one has no business adopting a child of another ethnicity unless there are faces that look similar to his or hers around the dinner table on a frequent basis. Here's the thing. We have many friends in transracial families. One family with AA twins is in our home weekly; another adoptive mom and I have been friends since elementary school. We are so grateful for their support and understanding throughout this journey we are on! We know without doubt that they will be there for us and for our child as we navigate this new chapter. My younger brother and his wife are planning to adopt transracially, as well. It feels so good to know that our child will have a cousin that looks similar to him or her. However, we do not have African American adults in our lives or home on any regular basis. Sigh. I do not doubt that God himself has called us to adopt transracially. I have friends who completely get this and friends who completely do not. But this is hard. Finding myself grieving, in a way, for my yet to be adopted child is a strange emotion. I will never be able to tell or show my own child what it is like to live as an African American. Undoubtedly there will be holes that we cannot fill, no matter how much love we already have for this child. And that stinks. I keep coming back to the reassurance that, whatever racial identity we have, our true identity is found in Christ. And I pray that we can convey that to ALL of our children. Boy, do I have a lot to learn...